MESSED!! =(

Clarice Yap!!! wake up wake up and wake up!!!

NO NO NO!! It won't hurt you anymore.. NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

T.T it is pain.. ='( why are you still having this ability? Compared to you, i think my life is totally messed up.

Hope you WONT be seeing this. Wanna close my blog to private, but i duno how.. idiot as usual~ =(

wanna cry a~~~!!!!!

calm down calm down.. nth's gonna hurt u.. he's letting u feel how he felt.. great! now u got to feel that.. and OUCH! it is pain, damn fuking pain!!! Get out from my body you fuking stupid heart!

Congratz! You won! Cos i still love.. damn stupid feeling! ARGH~

I LOVE YOU!

My heart pains when i thought she's your close girl friend.

I pretend i don't care. I pretend it doesn't hurt at all. I pretend not hearing. I pretend that i'm okay in front of u. I pretended. Did you realized?

I try to kill your hopes. When talk to you in phone, i really felt enlighten and happy. We've NEVER talk like that before. I love that time, you were talking patiently, listening to me. How good if everything could happen before everything goes wrong? Hope i wish~

It's good to let us know, dragging like this comes no benefit to both of us. It's not only you, those who really give out loves, HURTS! Sorry. It might not be the best word to mention, but, that's the only word.

Hope you would be fine. Hope you could succeed in everything. You're great! You really are!

I have almost forgotten about the feeling..

Because it never appear for some time when i'm with you..

I never worry you will run away from me because of some other girls..

This is call stable i guess? This is call secured i guess? This is call trust i guess?

The only problem we have was understanding. I don't have the problem right now, but i have a lot of other problems.

I'm feeling insecure. I'm scared. I'm losing trust. I don't believe. I'm alone.

I'm so damn worried and scared!

When i pick up the call today.. i don't know it will end up like that.

YOU! are still you... when YOU're fucked up.. u won't listen to others. Thats you..

after so long, i merely forgotten what person you are.. in my memory, you're so nice to me, b4 we really break apart now..

THE CALL, has really waken me up.. nothing has changed and nothing can be done.. i never ever think of stepping inside your life.. NEVER! believe or not, up to you.. i know no matter what i said, its just rubbish for you..

When i was scolding, did you ever noticed that i almost cry? I thought i can live peacefully, but one call destroyed everything, even my heart.. after v are separated, i still kena scolded.. why? i'm good to scold?? i've tolerate too much in the past, you're the first one who scolded me like no one cares and yet i still loved you.. But now.. i wont!

You have your life and i'll have mine.. Hope it wont happen again and i wont be picking up any phone calls from you and shouting at me.. You should not have the power to hurt me anymore! NEVER!

I miss you, there's alot alot of things to tell you.. But i could oni talk to thin air now... :(

it has been quite some time since i last heard about u.. i guess u 're living quite well.. 2 mths past, tepat tepat 2 months.. hmm~ found back one of our couple ring in my bag, where's urs?? some where in rubbish bin.. =( yea, it did remind me of sth of us, but its fading off.. ur image in my heart is blurred. Never see u on9 anymore, i guess u blocked me cos u really dun wanna hear frm me anymore..

wanna ask, "how are you?"

yea~ totally lost connection with u.. anything of u, i would never noe.. i still living those life, wanna go for part time job, but time table is full of studies.. n SHU accepted my application, gonna prepare for UK edi.. i'm quite excited.. how if v r still together? could v go thru this separation?? i think negatively, n d answer will be NO.. i guess i made a correct choice.. no more sorry to reduce my guilty, i'm glad to know dat u r better den last time.. u r free! yeapie!!! really hope everything good ll fall on u.. thank you so much!

I think i need to wake up. How this story gonna continue? I really cant control. The longer it goes, the more problems it came through. Maybe, i'm really sick and weak in a relationship. I'm not mature at all. How to be independent? The problems might not from us, but it would be from others. I wake myself up to face the reality. Its just too fast n rush. What i want actually? Do i really need worm inside my stomach to be with me? It will always come to a dead end.

There's a gap. Not with him, but with his friends. I bet if "you" are seeing this, you would agree. Yes! I see this problem. 1+1 will never equal 2. I persuade myself to be open-minded. I persuade myself to believe i'm one of them. I persuade myself to talk with them even i don't like to talk. "you" know my pattern. "you" know i hates to go social. But everyone just know. They would not take action. You and him, its the same.

1. Problems btween relationship

2. Problems btween connection of friends

How good if i don't have these problems to be chosen.

Avoid! Avoid! Avoid!